Suicide Squad New52 #21 Discipline and Punish Pt 2

Well, I really have come almost full circle now. But there is still so much to unpack in this, the first series of Suicide Squad in the New52. For example, this cover.

Aug 2013
Writer: Ales Kot
Artist: Patrick Zircher
Colours: Jason Keith

What is wrong with Harley's stomach?
Why does no one have eyeballs?
Who had the brills idea of locking up Waller... and leaving her a fire arm?
Has Harley always had long skeletal man fingers?
Am I supposed to be more scared of the "bad ass" Harley or of her hair style?
Is Harley's belt emblem a Pokeball?
Did she not only kill the guard but destroy their jacket too?
Has Harley never learnt the phrase "don't turn your back on your enemies?"
Why are Harley's gauntlets like ten times bigger today?
Who stole Harley's nail polish?
When did the Belle Reve cleaning crew give up entirely??

Issue starts with a flash forward in Las Vegas. Isn't that what everyone does though? Starts off normal then suddenly you're on a rooftop without your wolf pack and you're desperately trying to remember what happened 17 days ago.


Well, we know what happened because we open up on Waller doing a dodgy bit of tie in. Yay, O.M.A.C. They're always a bundle of fun. Anyway, she turns back to her usual daytime programming to see that Harley has stabbed the Unknown Soldier and waited until juuuuuust the right moment to whisper into his earpiece. Although at the rate she's getting through her sentences she probablt could. have. started. five. minutes. ago.

Harley didn't take to losing at Scrabble kindly.

DC Animated - Hush Trailer

So the trailer for the animated adaption of DC's Hush dropped the other day and wow was I... disappointed.

Which sucks! I really enjoyed the Hush comics and when I saw a trailer for the adaption - which I didn't even know they were doing - I clicked straight away. But oh boy was my enthusiasm dampened. It was like that classic Libra advert where the woman uses a pad to absorb the murder victim's blood so there was no trace of any wrong doing by the time the cops got there. It was like my niece's food at snack time. All gone!

Before, we could proudly say "Well the DC live action movies suck hairy donkey balls but at least they're killing it in the animated movie department!"
Only now it's like the animated department is going the way the Disney live actions are, like basically remakes just to keep the trademarks but with little, insidious changes made. Also Will Smith is getting his filthy little fingers into all of these pies. ANYWAY - we know why The Killing Joke and Batman and Harley Quinn etc were weird or bad movies... what's happening with Hush?


Okay - so for those who don't know, I don't want to spoil anything so go and read it! But in bare bones, Batman finds several of his enemies from varying ranks seemingly teaming up against him, but in odd ways and being led by someone he can't pin down. He starts to get suspicious and paranoid, so he searches to find out what's happening while his relationships - old and new - come back to him. Also there's a lot of cameos.

The comics were great, the art was nice and it was really cinematic in the way it was laid out and the way they did flashbacks etc. It kept you guessing, and made you look for little connections. It was like Lost but with comic characters and a better ending.

So... the trailer opens with the Batman/Catwoman rooftop chase/flirt which was fine... only the way they cut the dialogue kinda weird so it's like Catwoman's all sultry "We've being doing this dance for a while..." cuts to "LIKE THE VIEW, YA CORNDOG? IT'S ALL YOU GON' GEEEET" before she yeets herself off a building.

Gotham City Sirens #9 - Pieces of the Puzzle

I love the detective noir style cover already but it just gets better when you turn the page and the scene continues - as if you're Nygma opening the office door and entering the room/ scene. 

Correctly deducing that the Sirens aren't here for tea and niceties,  he gets down to the thick of it. The Sirens have found a corpse,  or rather they have each witnessed the victim in varying stages of life and death.

Harley volunteers to give her recollection first so we get treated to an amazing run down of her day,  which begins with cartoons, exercise and keyboard battles then ends with a dead body smashing through their skylight and ruining Harley's swim.

Ivy had just got back from a job interview when she sees the body enter the pool. Selina on the other hand had been for a medical check-up post Hush then a quick spar with Wildcat. When she hands home via rooftop she sees the body fall from the sky - muttering "doctor..." - so she dives after her and ends up heading into the pool as well.

Nygma is equal parts exasperated with the Sirens and intrigued by the mystery so he resolves to check it out. At first glance it appears like the Sirens have attached the victim and left their trademarks on her body.  There is a vine around the neck but it's not one of Ivy's usual hybrids but a common plant.  The clown make up smeared on her face is cheap pharmacy brand stuff and not Harley's theatrical quality style. Claw marks that couldn't have come from Selina's gloves but rather a real animal.

DC Universe Harley Quinn #59

Sooo... emancipated Harley wears a belt saying Puddin's Harley. That's totally cool, I guess. Apart from that, I like the details in her hands, the shadow effect is nice.. but it loses points for Harley's mother being shoe-horned in there when you know it's never going to change her high opinion of her angelic daughter. Some points back because Nathan couldn't give a shit. Does she even still have that stupid dog?

And no, not this time, crazy weeaboo style cover! This one is not as appealing as the last one. Your tubular body with melon boobs offends me and I don't understand what's happening in the background.

Getya tongue outta yer teeth unless you legitimately have food stuck in there!!



The first page is a bit jarring - Harley is dreaming about passing the trials and being a cosmic badass...while jumping over a crowd of well moisturised hands but the way she goes about it is just so vain!

"Brooklyn's favourite daughter, Harley Quinn...."

"I look so cool and hot!"

"Listen ta them, they love me!" 

This bugs me. (tee hee) But seriously, when has Harley faced any real opposition for being who she is? Let's face it, everyone gives her a pass, everyone apparently adores her, and she's never had to go through any cosmic shite to get to this point.
Still..... here we are apparently.

Watching an extreme close-up of Harley's eyeball like it's a horror movie, listening to her say she fell asleep on the comfy couch when she's clearly in a bed, then she goes to her en suite. So she's in her bedroom. Then oh no, she's got a bug head when she looks in the mirror!

Flashback to a day ago, where Harley is again swarmed by her adoring Legions, merely for standing on a stage about to be dunked. People even have the same foam gloves that Miley Cyrus tainted back in the day. So... this is for charity.. but I assume people have paid money for these, money that is probably going into Harley's pocket as we haven't heard otherwise.

So is her more recent fame based off her short lived faux-youTube series, that time she ran for Mayor or when she had her goon squad of stereotypes that tried to help the city but normally ended up making things worse. It's still really unclear if people realise she's that Harley Quinn that hung out with the Joker and what not.. every now and then someone says to her "grr grr you're a criminal grr grr" and Harley just goes "No, I've changed. Hmph!" and struts out to waves of applause from the general populace of Coney Island who just don't care about all the crap she's brought to their city since Harley "left her life of crime behind."

* montage of all the people Harley has killed or dismembered, the time she kept throwing her animal's excrement over the town, when she maimed people because she wanted to win a sports game, where she wreaked her SJW-type justice against people but in a way that was too extreme, every time she jumped at a chance to make her own life better but had dire consequences for other citizens (think Little Black Books, etc) and all the times she caused property damage*

Porn Parody - Digital Playground's Suicide Squad

I have dipped my toe in, why not get the whole foot wet?
Uhh... that's supposed to be a pool analogy... maybe it doesn't work the best with a porn review.

Yes, I reviewed the other major one - Axel Braun's  version so now it's Digital Playground's turn.

This one stars Aria Alexander as Harley and Isiah Maxwell as Deadshot.

Now right off the bat - tee hee - you can tell this one is basically a vehicle for the Harley Quinn actress - Aria Alexander. The intro credits - even though very small, only show stylised images of Harley and hardly mentions a squad. There's the briefest of plots thrown our way as well... something about Lex Luthor in Gotham? It's not impossible.. but you know he's a Superman villain in Metropolis, right? Guys?

So we open with just Harley and Deadshot (like, there's REALLY no Squad at all, huh?) and first off I have an issue with Deadshot's headpiece.

My what a big... eyepiece... you have. Ain't that thing heavy? Harley's wig is not the best either. It's not the worst of the worst (Suicide Squad joke, anyone?) but every now and then you see the fake looking super shiny blonde-ness, or when she goes to flip her pigtail over her shoulder and the whole freaking thing shifts dramatically.

Perhaps I should mention that this thing is just over half an hour. So, what is the story?