New Suicide Squad - because old suicides are so passe!

So the other day my partner and I went into the big bad city to collect his nephew from the airport. We noted without surprise that the other side of the highway was at a stand still. I helpfully and persuasively suggested that we visit our comic stores in order to pass the time. (Insert manic laughter here)

End result, I picked up a few Harley goodies including a new issue, the directors cut of issue zero, new Injustice, Gods among us comic and the new Suicide Squad. Well, I thought I'd give it a try. Odds are they can't do worse than before... oh wait, this IS DC we're talkin' bout Willis.

So the cover is interesting but it's another case of 'what's happening on the cover probably isn't in the book.' Like many things in the DC world that have Harley slapped on the cover and nothing inside but a mention or a brief cameo. Or awesome action scenes that are only implied and never occur in the book itself.

Nothing about this says hostile takeover of... um, hostiles.

Turns out Joker's Daughter, Deathstroke and Black Manta aren't forcing their way into this well balanced, over achieving dream team at all! They're already on it! So what else is new in the new suicide squad of the new 52? Wow, I sound like a jackass. Who comes up with these names, I feel so... so 90's and dirty!'

Well anyway, there's a new artist - the winner of the Harley-gate drama... but he's not exactly new in the industry. There's a new 'stache in town! Oh wait, that's the old 'stache that people wanted back since forever. There's a new cape in town..... no, wait, that's the same stupid cape that Harley keeps losing and regaining. There's a new face in town... noo... that's that ridiculous spoof of a character with that joke of a Joker character's decaying face? Damn, I hate the new Joker's Daughter.

Duela Dent was awesome! Now I bet this re-make is only here to remind people of the Joker's face being cut off or start some sort of groupie fight with Harley.

'IT'S A WHORE OFF!'

It occurs to me that they're really wearing the same outfit but in stupid colours and ... stupid everything. I really don't know why this is a character, or why DC is having such a hard on for psychotic clowns lately.
It's even worse when they keep doing the Harley is over the Joker thing and then bitching about some other clown that thinks she's the next best Joke----- Oh my stars, they made Harley into a hipster!! Nooooo!!

Anyway, the plot is about some new control guy fanboying over the XL task force. I don't get it. It's not really that big of a group. Hopefully if this new new remake is that confident about adding new people, we're going to be seeing a lot more permanent killings off or at least some character development.

Speaking of XL, Amanda Waller walks down the whitest, boringest, most pristine prison ever with a woman who is not a cardboard cut out super model type! I initially thought yay! progress in comics! which was followed up by a more sobering thought that they're probably just making fun of Amanda Waller not looking like that anymore. Yay?

So we're suddenly in Russia and Harley takes issue with the FACE while Deadshot and Manta strike weird generic comic poses. It's like someone's cut out the stock images from one of their comics and just pasted them in. I hope the Joker's Daughter gets a one shot like Harley did that explains how she chose her incredibly stupid and nonsensical outfit. Anyway, Deathstroke manages to jump over to Harley to nearly start fellatio with a gun and Deadshot has the best line of them all.

*ahem*

'It's always been pretty chaotic, but it was a chaotic I understood. Now? Now I don't know what's going on. '

I call shenanigans! No one knows what's ever going on in this comic, and if Deadshot ever did understand it then why was he always demanding answers or moaning about things before?

The plan gets laid out, namely bagging out Russia and destroying a place the team intends to search. Deadshot has an existential crisis when he's emasculated by the better assassin. Harley is again walking in the snow like a persistent hooker. One of Waller's eyes shrinks dramatically. Joker's Daughter apparently possesses enough force to explode a guy's head with her fist.



Things go surprisingly well and there are some excellent burns at the expense of Harley, Deadshot, Waller and the old team. Then the Red Rockets show up and one wonders if they did any research on Russian defence at all before lobbing grenades?

Pros:

• Art isn't too bad and is at least consistent
• Harley didn't do anything too stupid
• Seems like a brand new start and I didn't cringe as much as I thought I would

Cons:

• Existing issues with 'new' artist, seems to have trouble expressing movement
• Really wanting to like Sage but too much blah blah
• Involvement of New 52 Joker's Daughter in any shape or form