Harley Quinn and Gossamer - The Looney Tunes special

I didn't even know this guy had a name. He's kinda like Sweetums, from the Muppets. You know who it is but they're not a main character.

Wait - why is this a thing? They just did the Hanna Barbera cross overs, plus Archie... What's the next cash grab tie in gonna be?

Anyway, the main cover for this cross over no one probably needed is it's usual Conner schlock (her arms are about as long as her legs and her eyes look frickin' weird) but the variant by Quinones?

I've told you guys I love the Quinones Quinn? He's even got her in the costume she wore in the 25th Anniversary special!

Both in scenes from the actual comic but the variant looks a lot more natural and fun.

Harley Quinn/Gossamer - a Hairy Predicament!
Aug 2018

Synopsis:

A violent storm leaves a large crate washed up on the beach at Coney Island. When Harley breaks it open to see what’s inside, she suddenly has a new playmate to add to her cast of friends-a large, furry, orange beast called Gossamer. It’s all fun and games until a giant robot attacks them. But who sent it? Harley immediately suspects only one man, but is it really The Joker behind this destructive rampage?


Now this special is still written by Amanda Conner and Jimmy Palmiotti because apparently when you leave a project you can't actually leave it. I wish they would. Every issue they write is pretty much a personal affront to me. Although if they hate me as much as I hate their bland world and shitty characters.. well it explains a lot. What a vicious cycle.

Some things I noticed about this issue.. it's not as outright shit as much of this duo's crap normally is. I suspect DC felt the heavy hand of Warner Brothers/Looney Tunes here. That said, it's still pretty weird. For one thing, the opening shot is Harley sitting on a Joker head inflatable. The second thing is Coney Island's beach actually has clear waters. I've never been there, but I've heard enough jabs about it to know it's not exactly paradise.

Then....

Yeah... see, this is why I'm not a fan of the whole ship with Poison Ivy. I won't go into a rant about how she's about as good as the Joker is when looking for a spouse but even this lobotomised version of Poison Ivy is just.. ugh.

Okay. If I wanted to read a comic about relationships I'd go and find a romcom or a good manga.
Strangers in Paradise, Ranma 1/2, Fruits Basket, Rachel Rising.... I could go on.
I don't crack open a supervillain comic to read about some asshole sighing wistfully, catching ordinary civilian trains, making phone calls and making sure their apartment is okay.

Joker's Asylum II: Harley Quinn

"The most important day of the year"
August 2010
Writer: James Patrick
Art: Joe Quinones
Colours: Alex Sinclair

Here's one of my favourite comics to wash the taste of the last review out of my mouth.

Now, I love Quinones art when it comes to Harley Quinn. Maybe it's the similar surname, but he just seems to GET her. A lot more than any squad working on any Harley solo's since her original run.
The interior artwork and all the expressions are just ace. The cover's nice too. A very powerful, somewhat provocative stance (without being exploitative) but damn, look at how much detail there is on the scene. The messed up door and the smoking gun with blood on it, the light hitting Harley from below and casting Batman's shadow... just great.

Being Joker's Asylum, we open with Joker introducing the tale, a la Tales of the Crypt while in a plush chair, a dressing gown and holding a puppy. Our first shot of Harley is her bare feet showing out of her Arkham oranges while she's running down the hall and deftly evading guards and fail-safes. We don't get a good look at her face until she stops at a cliff.

Props to Arkham staff - they really tried. They pulled out every move in a rare attempt at being efficient. I wish they tried this shit whenever Joker feels the need to escape because there's no way he'd make this at all.

Now we see her face, Dr. Arkham desperately tries to understand what has motivated Harley to do this right now of all times but we all know what would make Harley do anything criminal, don't we?

Yep, the siren song of her obsession, her Puddin' and her devotion to him means that even though she could have been out, free and clear if she'd just waited a few weeks but now she's going to be on the lam with Batman and the cops and everyone hunting for her. She can't though, because she wants to be with her beloved cohort on Valentine's Day.






This is the classic Harley we know - the one that would jump off a damn cliff after baking cookies to be with someone that doesn't actually love her.
She arrives at an abandoned YMCA which was their hideout... apparently? I'm not sure what's sadder, the fact that there are several young men who will not be able to use the YMCA services anymore or that the hideout doesn't even have a proper pool.
She meets the one surviving but severely wounded hench man Spider who tells us why Joker's not there himself.

Harley is ticked off that Falcone has taken Joker on today of all days but she's already got a plan and is preparing for when she gets back with her beau.

Splat! Promotional Comic: Suicide Blonde - The Suicide Squad prequel

2016
Writer: Tony Bedard
Pencils: Tom Derenick
Inks: Juan Albarran

So here's a review of a promotional comic that DC did alongside Splat!. Splat! is a hair dye brand. Seems like a match made in heaven given Harley's recent.. infatuation with.. changing her hair colour every five minutes. I recall Splat! advertisements in some of my older comics so they've probably been close to the superhero and pop culture scene for a while.

Let's have a look.

Urrrrggggghhh. First page is a full spread of Harley Quinn in her cell at Belle Reve. Do you remember the trailers for Suicide Squad, and the scenes in the movie where she does her little acrobatic act half naked before she gets all Miley Cyrus with licking things, then she head butts her cell because she's frustrated about her sleeping conditions? Well here's more of that! And still no-one questioning why she's essentially making a noose in her cell and giving herself dodgy prison tatts.

Waller comes past and she forces Harley to reminisce on being outside, in the fresh air and sunlight... so, money on the table, I'm shocked didn't include Harley receiving sunburn harder than any given ginger. Oh, my apologies she said nightlife.

I first looked at this and I was like.. what the hell is this? Then I remembered, Suicide Squad Harley Quinn and Joker are #relationshipgoals! Yeah! The one thing I wish my relationships had more of are stereotypical conversations about the girl not being ready fast enough while the girl imagines how a red drape would work on her as a dress. Then the boy can stand around and front about being so gangsta while constantly checking his watch. Yes... relationship goals. Sure..

See, that's the thing about the whole 'gangsta' Joker - he has to have a moll and be seen on the social scene instead of being the classic villain we know that just goes out and does crime that he's planned out meticulously or perhaps made up on the fly because he thought of something funny...
he wouldn't really care if Harley was there or not.