DCAU: Suicide Squad - Hell to Pay

First things first - this hasn't come out yet, but we already know it's going to be better than actual Suicide Squad. Time will tell if it's as good as Assault on Arkham. Speaking of... this new Suicide Squad animated movie won't be in the same.. "universe" .... so it's not a sequel.

Yeah, that's right. This Suicide Squad is DCAU while Assault on Arkham is technically more in the Arkham game universe. Which is why everyone looks different.

It's good because Deadshot is not built like a tank in the new one (which I always thought was stupid because he's the gun guy, the sniper... it wouldn't matter if he was skinny or short. Why can I fit two of me in AOA Deadshot's silhouette alone?? Why are his shoulders so far away from his neck?? How is he alive??) I don't like Killer Frost's redesign in HTP as much as her AOA one... it just doesn't seem to have any personality?
Boomerang is pretty much the same.. that's fine. Harley...

Oh Harley.

Harley looked amazing in AOA - even if her modified bodysuit revealed her most dangerous weapon - not the dirty-bomb mallet but the razor sharp bony ass hips she had - and she was blatantly used as a sex object for most of the movie (kinda like Maggot Robbie, but the animated version at least had a character arc and some decent lines!) 

This HTP Harley looks kinda hideous, face wise. You guys already know that I think the blue/pink eye shadow is a terrible costume choice. At least she has face paint on her original flesh tone body, not the Joker dip dye, I guess. It just seems weird that she's wearing evening gloves and matching thigh high stockings.. with generic Daisy Duke jeans and hipster sneakers? 

Suicide Squad New52 #12

Now here I have another issue where I previously reviewed it on my other blog, so again I'll copy the parts over where I thought I was absolutely hilarious or on the mark in highlighted areas and then I'll add revisions from my today-self in the normal script.

Oct 2012

THE TRAITOR UNMASKED – YOU WON’T BELIEVE WHO IT IS!

Yes, well, we’ll see. Imitation Waller looks surprised, but that’s probably because a) her cleavage isn’t showing and b) she’s just seen how much screen time she’s getting this issue.

If you bothered to read the last issue you would know that the Suicide Squad landed in a poorly written episode of Scooby Doo and now cannibals are going to eat them for some reason.

Honestly, they wouldn’t be my first choice. I’m sure pickings are slim in the ancient-Mayan comic world but I would like to credit these guys some brains. Would you eat a shark man, a pasty wannabe clown, a dude who likens himself to a spider (eww) or the other guy who’s like, on fire half of the time? Then again, shark is a delicacy and they can save on the costs because the other guy’s a BBQ, mate!

Ermhagawd, despite being upside down we can totally see on top of this stone pillar while we have a thrilling debate on whether or not King Shark has le secret powers.

I had a secret power once. Telepathy. Oh, sure, some sceptics say I just stapled a note to my forehead but when people looked at me – they knew that it wasn’t safe to go back in the water.
I became a hero! Well, I would have been.. except I don’t live near the beach so the folks in range of my powers didn’t need rescuing. But, like all psychic powers – it’s the thought that counts. Ha!

Pew! Pew! Like, Waller to the rescue! No, wait! It’s Basilisk! No, wait! It’s the man with the scarf that has a life of it’s own – Captain Boomerang!

Well damn, this review is perfect so far - I won't have to change a thing! 

Hmm. On second thought, I'd prefer to rant and rave so maybe I will. 

Harley and Ivy meet Betty and Veronica #4

Ah, how this series makes me nostalgic for high school bullshit. Wait, no it doesn't! High school was bullshit!

I'm kinda getting sick of seeing these cheerleader covers. Like.. this series still hasn't told me if Veronica is actually a cheerleader so I guess it's just that people like drawing older women in high schooler's bodies wearing cheerleaders outfits. Should we just be lucky Betty and Veronica don't go to a religious school too?









Anyway, we last left off with Ronnie still thinking he was the Joker after a whack to the noggin' and his intervention has somehow helped Betley and Ronivy instead of getting them all killed.

I get the girls using the distraction to their advantage but let's be frank. What is going on in panel 2 there? Are they leaping towards or attacking their foes or is this just a show of power?
There's no perspective and only later are we shown that they are anywhere near Reggie-Joker. Seemingly AFTER the thugs leave the scene.
I do like Ronivy's hippie talk though, that was pretty funny.

They decide to hide from the cops in a tree that Ronivy mutates - the tree subsequently falls down but manages to hide them anyway.

Next, we're back at highschool with Hartty and Ivyca. They can't remember anyone's name and don't even respond to their own 'names.' The Blossom twins - look, who even are these people I don't read Archie comics! - appear and start some drama about not being invited to the party.

Hartty even tries to blow their cover even further by bemoaning being back at high school...

Suicide Squad New52 #11

Sept 2012

Here we are again with that wacky Suicide Squad! Now this issue narrowly avoids being sinned for 'cover situation not appearing in comic' which is nice because this scene actually DOES happen in the issue.. just not entirely focused on Harley Quinn.

So she's got spooky Batman eyes, apparently wears full vinyl, they couldn't even be arsed to mix up her colours so she's got blue on one side and red on the other for some reason and someone seems to have broken all of her fingers. The guys are all in the background, no one cares about them. Except Deadshot and his aerial ballerina antics. So en pointe. Hah!

Now where we left off, some high up Basilisk random offed himself in a mess of convoluted situations. Waller has some questions about this, so she interrogates El Diablo. Yeah, nevermind that he kissed the good doctor Visyak to expel the cyanide from her lungs, he must be the spy! Or he probably didn't want to mack out with a snakey dude. Whatever.

Next she'll have Diablo feed her grapes. 

Waller has the guards standing either side of El Diablo conveniently teleport away so she can attack him with a collapsible chair.  She again boasts that she's happy to off any of these squad jerks via neck-bomb but no one believes her. 

Next thing we know, El Diablo is packed onto a cargo plane and aww, Waller even had him strapped in! How sweet. I'm sure she'd hate for the guy she just threatened to get hurt. 

Retro Review: Harley Quinn #16 - Look! Up in the sky...!

March 2002
Both Sides Now

Time again to join our delightful dame of demented mischief on her adventures in Metropolis!

This time around, we open on S.T.A.R Labs where Jimmy Olsen and Holly Chance are lucky to be alive after a siege of some sort.




Inspector Turpin asks them for any information about the siege or how many people are still inside following evacuation. This leads into a flashback where it's revealed both Holly Chance and Harley Quinn were in the same room together!

Say Whaaat?! Aren't Holly Chance and Harley Quinn the same person? Yes. Yes they certainly are.

Let's flashback to what actually happened. Jimmy Olsen looking out for his new buddy Holly (oh wow, that's an accidental pun!) by getting her a morning coffee - even though she's three hours late for work - and saving her bacon (or not, Jewish pun!) with the boss. Jimmy is sent to get photos of a new jet pack being developed at S.T.A.R. Labs and Holly wheedles her way in to coming along as well... after nipping home for a quick costume change.





Don't worry, there's still plenty of time for a dumb Superman gag. Oh Clark, will you ever learn?

Meanwhile, Harley/Holly is putting on her own disguise under her day wear and trying to convince
Ivy to come with her but her green thumbed roomie is more preoccupied with some baby plants and their tender developmental stages.

Holly and Jimmy meet up at the labs and are shown the device. Jimmy wants to get a picture of the jet pack on someone normal looking (and maybe more attractive than the older cantankerous doctor) but Holly has vanished!

In all honesty she's been dragged through a side door by Poison Ivy - and that's what she tells the inspector... just omitting the fact that they're partners in crime.

Harley threatening her boy toy 'Freckles'

Gotham City Sirens #6

Jan 2010

When we last left off, original Joker sidekick Gaggy had been released from the big house (no pun intended) and was dead set on reliving the good old olden days.. you know what he means. The days with no Harley Quinn.

This cover... I like. Poison Ivy looks very powerful and the neon-ish petals are a nice touch.

Inside, Harley's getting dragged off to a nicer moider spot or maybe a retro death trap. Poison Ivy took a bubble thing (?!) to the face and now she can't adventure no mo'. Catwoman did not, I repeat, did NOT land on her feet when falling into the hyena enclosure, leaving thousands of fans and cat enthusiasts disappointed.

On the way to her certain doom, Harley catches Gaggy by surprise and he begins to villain monologue. It's nice to know that some things never change.










Selina and Ivy escape their own personal death traps only to fall victim to another one. They delay their painful deaths momentarily but end up calling for back up in the form of one Jenna Duffy the Carpenter and her Tools of Compounding Invoices.
That's pretty much how you know the Sirens were desperate. They may leave with their lives today, but my gosh they will pay through the nose now if they weren't already!

The thing I like about the Gaggy saga is how it quietly parallels Harley's story and gives a new insight to the Joker before she arrived.