*Sucks in breath* H'ooookay. Christmas issue. Here we go.
Right... standard comic character harasses Santa in a Christmas themed outfit. Well, she added baubles to her collar... like that wouldn't be impractical, itchy and awkward. Like her weird pom pom laces! That's nearly it's own death trap! Apart from that it's just her ordinary roller derby outfit. I really feel like this suit just doesn't get washed enough on a daily basis. Still, it's better than her weird Christmas rocket suit elf thing. Let's hope that monstrosity doesn't come back! Plus, this cover hurts me seeing things like 'plush toys for the hyenas that DC killed off horrifically' and the 'good old jester costume that my mom trashed a few issues back' on her Christmas list. Plus, how short AND wide is Santa's chair? All the better to hold your tiny hands up my dear. Other cover is basically Harley spray painting a snowman. It's okay, but I would have thought it would be a nice excuse to draw her nostalgic Christmas outfit instead of her wearing uggs and a scarf if it's soooo cold, right?
I like her jacket though, and how the interior quilt looking pleat is like diamonds.. I still don't get why she's got stars on her boobs like pasties, how do you screw up a deck of cards theme like you did her colours? You've got most of it in your logo, mate!
Ohh... yay... the space elf from Christmas hell costume.... it's made a reappearance.... whyyyyyy
Just like the weird Timms art and the zillion and one speech bubbles. This is going to be more painfully awkward than that time Rudolph asked Harley for his nose back.
So already this comic has a lot going against it. The dodgy Christmas special, the weird outfits, the art's not the best, the dialogue's more long winded than the entirely of A Song of Ice and Fire despite NOTHING of interest actually happening and of course... the Quinzelllllllls.
I vehemently reject the new origin of Harley from the New 52. Her backstory was established better and more comprehensively before that and it alllll went downhill from there. We didn't get much of her family until Gotham City Sirens - and because Paul Dini did that, it feels like that should be canon. Prior to that, we only had an Elseworlds through Thrillkiller. That was also parents and one younger brother.
Now, people took liberties with Harley's origin since the New52 and the amount of siblings she had and the extent of her parent's jerkoff natures fluctuated wildly. It seemed like they gave her multiple brothers since Detective Comics 23.2 - purely for the reason they wanted to make Harley feel like she had to get out from the bogan family she was suffering with. Like, a one page thing, then they vanished for eons.
It wouldn't be so bad if they added something to the story but they don't. For example, in Gotham City Sirens - Harley's dad is a con man and largely absent due to prison - tying into her wanting to get into the criminal mind to understand why he did what he did, her mom loves her but is embarrassed by her criminal behaviour. Her brother is a deadbeat sponge. Harley gave him money so he could move out and look after his various children to different mamas but he squanders it. Still, Harley's mom looks down on Harley due to her criminal associations. It shows a nice, realistic conflict and everyone plays a part.
Now, Harley's solo comic character list- even though it's been trimmed down considerably since the blight that was Connor/Palmiotti have left - is still quite large. Her dad is still a criminal but is shown more as a 'good' criminal that has her back. Her mom - has.. no personality... she's just there to talk about how AWESOME and how WONDERFUL her daughter is.. because Harley's never had anyone do that for her. *eyeroll*. There's also Barry - name is kept, music affiliation is kept, but now he's a death metal one note joke. Frankie is tall... Ezzie likes... video games?
Note - I got all that information including their names from the above image. I think that's the most we've seen of these random people since that one page in Detective Comics 23.2. It's a complete missed opportunity to have this family at odds with Harley due to her criminal past and the way they keep having Harley panic about her family showing up (every time they turn up or are even mentioned in this series) or Harley grilling her dad - concerned he's pulling another con on her, yet everyone's either cool with her or are too busy being their own kind of evil to bother much.
The current writers have done a great deal more work in making the multiple characters a bit less stereotypical but here... what you see is what you get. Don't raise your hopes. At all.
It's any generic family ruins event movie.
Barry decides to play an ice sculpture smashingly loud guitar solo after being told not to do anything.
Frankie sees Harley going off at Barry and says "I CAN HELP TOO!" like Barry had actually been helping anything but his help is using drones that he didn't come in with carrying food that he could have done himself. Oh, and his technology talks enough to create a poem about how it's got no battery left... which begs the question as to why he wasn't alerted to charge it in the first place. The drones fall and this completely destroys the 20-seat dining table because ... the drones are either extremely OP or it's supposed to be funny.
Harley's dad sits on a prop chair and breaks that. Could have been handy to have a sign saying 'do not sit' or something. Does Harley's favourite movie even exist? Don't care enough to Google.
Ezzie sets the Christmas tree on fire.. and no one particularly seems to care that they brought an arsonist to a party that has several flammable things in a small, enclosed area.
Harley's mom is presumably still standing by the door where the rest of the family left her. Tina - a massive low tier Female Fury somehow manages to be absent from most scenes despite being ther biggest thing in the room. Coach - blind Coach - keeps peering around the corner. I just finished watching Avatar: The Last Airbender and there is so much effort put into making Toph a well rounded character who just happens to be blind. The main characters turn around when they see or hear something, Toph doesn't. That's not saying no blind person can look in the direction of a distraction but it genuinely seems like Coach is trying to look at the scene. Ironic, as I wish I couldn't see it.
The climax - for want of a better word - is when Harley explodes at her family in anger for ruining her Christmas. Then this happens.
Sigh.
Is this why we've seen so much of Harley's mom lately? I feel like this is a cheap emotional shot. Tell me Harley's mom got cancer after being in too much contact with Harley's toxic skin - that's much more investing. This scene is just.. I mean...
Yeah, I set your Christmas tree on fire because I wanted to break this upsetting bit of news to you gently! #RELATABLE Also death by toxic Christmas tree fumes or burning the house down with us in it is a great way to be concerned for my mom's wellbeing.
Harley breaks down and runs off leaving her mom to go and comfort her because she's the victim in all this CLEARLY... they waffle on about Christmas miracles and how Harley over reacts to stuff, which she disputes before having a dream sequence about shooting up a doctor.
It rings of terrible.... terrible authenticity. Just like Harley's immediate jump to stealing Superman's blood instead of.. hmm, putting her medical degree or traditional medicine to good work.
Also... has anyone ever explained why Harley is constantly stealing Th' Main Man's lingo?
It bothers me. It's a Czarnian thing, but apparently anyone can just appropriate their culture without any repercussion. Doesn't sound like Lobo, despite.. sounding... like Lobo. Hmm.
Then everyone has a perfect Christmas with a Christmas selfie. Yay.
Ezzie hits on Catwoman because of course someone does, especially the youngest kid there. Catwoman looks out of place, and out of character and it makes the absence of Poison Ivy even more obvious. (See Heroes in Crisis.) She's also in her work outfit.. it's weird.
Then there's some knock off Starfire with our next gimmick issue.
Harley's mom said a shooting star landed on the weird volcano that wasn't here last week, but in the epilogue of the last issue said two months had passed since that happened. Flawed continuity says whaaaa..?
Harley's family is Jewish. We all know Harley likes Christmas and that's fine.. but what, they couldn't do Hannukah for fear of alienating the general public?
Why is there a Starfire knock off foreshadowing the next issue? How do randoms keep landing in Coney Island? Is this why all aliens seem to hate us?
Why does Harley's mom go on about Hawaiian Christmas phrases?
How structurally sound is that sticky taped monstrosity of a dining table?
I also think it's a bit rich of Harley to get upset about her family ruining things.. I mean, that's normally her job to be loud, irritating and obnoxiously ignorant about boundaries.
Harley: What's the con? Why are you all here?
Dad: No con! We just, uh, wanna spend a delightful Christmas with ya!
Harley: I've seen too many episodes of Intervention to buy this baloney!
Harley: This ice ain't exactly gonna sculpt itself into an abstract presentation of peace, joy and presents!
Harley: Barry, it's a Christmas party, not an energy drink commercial!
Mom: Don't take this the wrong way but... sometimes ya got a tendency to take things the wrong way.
Mom: Ready to go back? Maybe yer brothers have gotten substantially less annoying by now.
Right... standard comic character harasses Santa in a Christmas themed outfit. Well, she added baubles to her collar... like that wouldn't be impractical, itchy and awkward. Like her weird pom pom laces! That's nearly it's own death trap! Apart from that it's just her ordinary roller derby outfit. I really feel like this suit just doesn't get washed enough on a daily basis. Still, it's better than her weird Christmas rocket suit elf thing. Let's hope that monstrosity doesn't come back! Plus, this cover hurts me seeing things like 'plush toys for the hyenas that DC killed off horrifically' and the 'good old jester costume that my mom trashed a few issues back' on her Christmas list. Plus, how short AND wide is Santa's chair? All the better to hold your tiny hands up my dear. Other cover is basically Harley spray painting a snowman. It's okay, but I would have thought it would be a nice excuse to draw her nostalgic Christmas outfit instead of her wearing uggs and a scarf if it's soooo cold, right?I like her jacket though, and how the interior quilt looking pleat is like diamonds.. I still don't get why she's got stars on her boobs like pasties, how do you screw up a deck of cards theme like you did her colours? You've got most of it in your logo, mate!
Ohh... yay... the space elf from Christmas hell costume.... it's made a reappearance.... whyyyyyy
Just like the weird Timms art and the zillion and one speech bubbles. This is going to be more painfully awkward than that time Rudolph asked Harley for his nose back.
So already this comic has a lot going against it. The dodgy Christmas special, the weird outfits, the art's not the best, the dialogue's more long winded than the entirely of A Song of Ice and Fire despite NOTHING of interest actually happening and of course... the Quinzelllllllls.
I vehemently reject the new origin of Harley from the New 52. Her backstory was established better and more comprehensively before that and it alllll went downhill from there. We didn't get much of her family until Gotham City Sirens - and because Paul Dini did that, it feels like that should be canon. Prior to that, we only had an Elseworlds through Thrillkiller. That was also parents and one younger brother.
Now, people took liberties with Harley's origin since the New52 and the amount of siblings she had and the extent of her parent's jerkoff natures fluctuated wildly. It seemed like they gave her multiple brothers since Detective Comics 23.2 - purely for the reason they wanted to make Harley feel like she had to get out from the bogan family she was suffering with. Like, a one page thing, then they vanished for eons.
It wouldn't be so bad if they added something to the story but they don't. For example, in Gotham City Sirens - Harley's dad is a con man and largely absent due to prison - tying into her wanting to get into the criminal mind to understand why he did what he did, her mom loves her but is embarrassed by her criminal behaviour. Her brother is a deadbeat sponge. Harley gave him money so he could move out and look after his various children to different mamas but he squanders it. Still, Harley's mom looks down on Harley due to her criminal associations. It shows a nice, realistic conflict and everyone plays a part.
Now, Harley's solo comic character list- even though it's been trimmed down considerably since the blight that was Connor/Palmiotti have left - is still quite large. Her dad is still a criminal but is shown more as a 'good' criminal that has her back. Her mom - has.. no personality... she's just there to talk about how AWESOME and how WONDERFUL her daughter is.. because Harley's never had anyone do that for her. *eyeroll*. There's also Barry - name is kept, music affiliation is kept, but now he's a death metal one note joke. Frankie is tall... Ezzie likes... video games?
Note - I got all that information including their names from the above image. I think that's the most we've seen of these random people since that one page in Detective Comics 23.2. It's a complete missed opportunity to have this family at odds with Harley due to her criminal past and the way they keep having Harley panic about her family showing up (every time they turn up or are even mentioned in this series) or Harley grilling her dad - concerned he's pulling another con on her, yet everyone's either cool with her or are too busy being their own kind of evil to bother much.
The current writers have done a great deal more work in making the multiple characters a bit less stereotypical but here... what you see is what you get. Don't raise your hopes. At all.
It's any generic family ruins event movie.
Barry decides to play an ice sculpture smashingly loud guitar solo after being told not to do anything.
Frankie sees Harley going off at Barry and says "I CAN HELP TOO!" like Barry had actually been helping anything but his help is using drones that he didn't come in with carrying food that he could have done himself. Oh, and his technology talks enough to create a poem about how it's got no battery left... which begs the question as to why he wasn't alerted to charge it in the first place. The drones fall and this completely destroys the 20-seat dining table because ... the drones are either extremely OP or it's supposed to be funny.
Harley's dad sits on a prop chair and breaks that. Could have been handy to have a sign saying 'do not sit' or something. Does Harley's favourite movie even exist? Don't care enough to Google.
Ezzie sets the Christmas tree on fire.. and no one particularly seems to care that they brought an arsonist to a party that has several flammable things in a small, enclosed area.
Harley's mom is presumably still standing by the door where the rest of the family left her. Tina - a massive low tier Female Fury somehow manages to be absent from most scenes despite being ther biggest thing in the room. Coach - blind Coach - keeps peering around the corner. I just finished watching Avatar: The Last Airbender and there is so much effort put into making Toph a well rounded character who just happens to be blind. The main characters turn around when they see or hear something, Toph doesn't. That's not saying no blind person can look in the direction of a distraction but it genuinely seems like Coach is trying to look at the scene. Ironic, as I wish I couldn't see it.
The climax - for want of a better word - is when Harley explodes at her family in anger for ruining her Christmas. Then this happens.
Sigh.
Is this why we've seen so much of Harley's mom lately? I feel like this is a cheap emotional shot. Tell me Harley's mom got cancer after being in too much contact with Harley's toxic skin - that's much more investing. This scene is just.. I mean...
Yeah, I set your Christmas tree on fire because I wanted to break this upsetting bit of news to you gently! #RELATABLE Also death by toxic Christmas tree fumes or burning the house down with us in it is a great way to be concerned for my mom's wellbeing.
WHAT.
THE.
HELL.
Harley breaks down and runs off leaving her mom to go and comfort her because she's the victim in all this CLEARLY... they waffle on about Christmas miracles and how Harley over reacts to stuff, which she disputes before having a dream sequence about shooting up a doctor.
It rings of terrible.... terrible authenticity. Just like Harley's immediate jump to stealing Superman's blood instead of.. hmm, putting her medical degree or traditional medicine to good work.
 |
| YFW you realise your child is essentially basic |
Also... has anyone ever explained why Harley is constantly stealing Th' Main Man's lingo?
It bothers me. It's a Czarnian thing, but apparently anyone can just appropriate their culture without any repercussion. Doesn't sound like Lobo, despite.. sounding... like Lobo. Hmm.
Then everyone has a perfect Christmas with a Christmas selfie. Yay.
Ezzie hits on Catwoman because of course someone does, especially the youngest kid there. Catwoman looks out of place, and out of character and it makes the absence of Poison Ivy even more obvious. (See Heroes in Crisis.) She's also in her work outfit.. it's weird.
Then there's some knock off Starfire with our next gimmick issue.
The Short End of the Jester Schtick
No wise words... just questions.Harley's mom said a shooting star landed on the weird volcano that wasn't here last week, but in the epilogue of the last issue said two months had passed since that happened. Flawed continuity says whaaaa..?
Harley's family is Jewish. We all know Harley likes Christmas and that's fine.. but what, they couldn't do Hannukah for fear of alienating the general public?
Why is there a Starfire knock off foreshadowing the next issue? How do randoms keep landing in Coney Island? Is this why all aliens seem to hate us?
Why does Harley's mom go on about Hawaiian Christmas phrases?
How structurally sound is that sticky taped monstrosity of a dining table?
I also think it's a bit rich of Harley to get upset about her family ruining things.. I mean, that's normally her job to be loud, irritating and obnoxiously ignorant about boundaries.
Wotta Comedian!
Harley: What's the con? Why are you all here?
Dad: No con! We just, uh, wanna spend a delightful Christmas with ya!
Harley: I've seen too many episodes of Intervention to buy this baloney!
Harley: This ice ain't exactly gonna sculpt itself into an abstract presentation of peace, joy and presents!
Harley: Barry, it's a Christmas party, not an energy drink commercial!
Mom: Don't take this the wrong way but... sometimes ya got a tendency to take things the wrong way.
Mom: Ready to go back? Maybe yer brothers have gotten substantially less annoying by now.
Bonus Panel!
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