Birds of Prey trailer released

You know why it's called a trailer? Because they're often linked to vehicles. As in.. my fears are becoming founded.. and Maggot Hurley is just erasing the entire awesome of Birds of Prey in favour of a Harley Quinn fame train because.. because she has Hollywood clout.. and likes herself too much I guess? I'm not linking it, if you wanna waste half a minute of your life then you can search for it.

The actual title of this movie is
Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn)

Well...... when a 34 second clip of a DC comics title Harley Quinn has literally nothing to do with shows about 25 seconds of Maggot Hurley swanning around acting drunk and trying to do the seductive lollipop thing but failing miserably... aaaand the ACTUAL Birds of Prey get squished into a couple of seconds with a hideous amount of quick shots - so quick you can barely tell what's going on and who anyone is. Plus, the titular Birds have to share this time with what's supposed to be the villains, I guess and then the whole 'fade to black/see you soon' thing.


So... that's really disappointing. Not gonna lie.

Besides, you can't just whip out a fantabulous word like you're a knock off Willy Wonka!
Girl, you're not even a second rate drag queen!

"Guess who went dumpster bin op-shopping again! .....MEEEE!!!!"

I remember reading something she said back when Suicide Squad was about to come out - something about how she read a couple of comics and just didn't 'get' the character. Man, this is becoming clearer and clearer each day. I mean, I GET wanting to make a 'new' version of a character for the big screen, I do. Lord knows everyone else freakin' has their own version of Harley Quinn. At the same time, if you're not going to even be true to a tiny bit of the character's origins... why bother?

Next it'll be an unfunny Joker, a Batman that shoots people and a Superman that doesn't care.
OH WAIT.


So, who else might we get to see in this movie (egos permitting?)



Huntress - Elizabeth Mary Winstead

A terrific actress who I loved in Scott Pilgrim, 10 Cloverfield Lane, and other stuff. I think she'd be a good Huntress with her ability to pull off the sassy humour and the dark inner turmoil. And we so need a good Huntress. My word, I watched Arrow (I don't think it's a show for me but I could enjoy laughing at it) and I was stunned at what they did to Helena. She went from a complete self made bad-ass to some emo sook who was taught by Green Arrow. Umm... WHUT.

I could have looked past this but they made her into the 'don't do things this way!' vigilante that everyone looked down on - meanwhile Green Arrow's guilty of how much murder? I would like to comment on Huntress's costume buuuut I can barely see it.

Black Canary -  Jurnee Smollett-Bell

Admittedly, I am not familiar with this actress. She's been in a lot of big things like Full House, Hangin' with Mr. Cooper, NYPD Blue, Cosby, Grey's Anatomy, True Blood, ER etc... but I have never watched any of them. Apart from one or two episodes of True Blood - but geez who would have thought a soap opera with vampires would be the boring kind of trashy?
Uh, aparently she's also in Captain Planet 4.... of which I also did not know had a first movie.
I do know of her brother Jussie, vaguely from Empire. I do not think they have any relation to Captain Smollett.

I have seen a lot of comments that Black Canary's character has been changed racially because Maggot did not want another skinny blonde running around upstaging her. I don't know if that's true... but the way Maggot's throwing herself into the spotlight at the expense of the other cast members does leave a foul taste and I wouldn't put it past her to be honest.
I'm not a fan of switching races 'just because' but I also understand the need for diversity in roles.
Unfortunately, when the 'best actor' is cast it normally ends up like Avatar: The Last Airbender bad or Will Smith playing Will Smith as a white character who is now just a 'black stereotype of Will Smith' level of bad.

OH WAIT.

Looks like they're doing that whole singer schtick that I wasn't too crash hot about. Well, I don't really have a strong opinion either way. It just seems too obvious for a screamin' superhero.

Cassandra Cain - Ella Jay Basco

Apparently she's been in Veep and Grey's Anatomy and something about Donuts. I've never heard of her.

When I first read Batgirl/Cassandra Cain's solo - I loved it and it was my gateway drug into more Batgirl. Before, I'd liked Batgirl well enough but not enough to seek her out like I did with Harley. 

I thought her whole introduction in that series was a really cool concept, and what they did with fighting as a language. She's got a broken arm in the teaser. I wonder if it's because of that time she fought Shiva in the above comic and broke her arm but kept fighting.... I also wonder if they broke her arm behind the scenes so that Maggot could scrawl obscenities all over it and get second hand screen time. 

My money is on number two, because even if they do bring Shiva in it's just gonna be a failure in "show, don't tell" again. Like, if they killed Robin and didn't show it on screen. 

OH WAIT.

Renee Montoya - Rosie Perez
Our first glimpse of Renee is her just chugging back the alcohol. Yes.. there was that whole incident but our first introduction to the one cop under Gordon who actually goes the extra mile to do her job is just a raging alcoholic. Maybe they will show her as a super cop... but I don't trust the movie so far to do her story justice. It'd be like having sweet Harley Quinn portrayed as a gangster floozy...

OH WAIT. 

Anyway, the name didn't ring any bells but apparently she's been in White Men Can't Jump, Pitch Perfect 2, Riding in Cars with Boys  and a voice actor in The Road to El Dorado, The Cleveland Show, Go, Diego! Go! so even if the name don't ring a bell, I've seen/heard her work. 

Victor Zsasz - Chris Messina
With the awesome version of Zsasz on Gotham, Messina has some big shoes to fill. Metaphorically speaking.. I have no idea how big Anthony Carrigan's shoes actually are. However - Zsasz was one of the genuinely scary (not even because no one can spell/pronounce his name!) and one of the few Batman villains that could absolutely NOT have a PR flip. He doesn't get the overplayed sob story to make us feel sorry for him, he doesn't get that one moment that shows he is a good soul deep down, you NEVER feel like Zsasz has potential for redemption.

Somehow Zsasz in Gotham is kind of charming, and I feel like we could be friends...which is even creepier. Well, not so much for me but my friends and family might want to panic now.

All he wants to do is kill. He doesn't leave the usual pattern like a Rogue's Gallery member, he kills without rhyme or reason. He tallies up his victims on his skin, he thinks he's helping people by killing them but ultimately doesn't care about them. Even disarmed and subdued he's formidable.

Soo.... not sure what to expect because apart from Gotham, Zsasz isn't really used much - which just goes to make him even more of a threat, as you're not so exposed to him until it MEANS something.

This guy was in Argo, Six Feet Under, Law and Order and You've got Mail etc... so I'm sure he's got the chops and I'm kind interested to see why they went with Zsasz as one of the antagonists but at the same time I'm like.... Why does this guy remind me of Zayn? I don't even like One Direction! 

Black Mask/Roman Sionis - Ewan McGregor

Well, who doesn't know this guy?

The Train Spotting Jedi Master who knows a Million Ways to Die in the West while covered in Moulin Rouge? He's a Haywire Son of a Gun who loves Phillip Morris! He's a man who Stares at Goats but it makes Perfect Sense. His Black Hawk is Down with Love and he got Brassed Off Blue Juice and put Christopher Robin to Doctor Sleep and ended up Miles Ahead in his Last Days in the Desert. What a Velvet Goldmine.

Good old Ewan. Excited to see his performance.. but also curious as why there's no black mask on Black Mask. Is this going to be an origin story or just a re-hashed 'we paid $XXXX for Will Smith's face, better keep that mask his character always wears OFF of his head!' 

Then.... 

There's this bitch. 

You know her, she's flashed her vag in a few flicks, acted like a stuck up cow in others.. 

Spaghetti legs?

Stick arms?

Misplaced patriotism gone wrong? (Hey USA, you can keep her!)

But first, let me ruin your comic characters!

As usual, most of the hype is about 'Harley's' outfits... although, it's not really hype. It's like Harley was the methed out coke head skank in Suicide Squad, but now she's mellowed out and became that one weird aunt in everyone's extended family that's a wishy washy weird hippie type. 

People are saying this is supposed to be a prequel.. but that makes no sense if Harley 'I'm infatuated with crusty ass clowns because of this ten second badly cut flashback' Quinn acts like a sad heartbroken teen with a crush on a Mexican ganglord. 

Biggest hype so far has been around her dog tag that says 'Bruce.' Everyone's like either "oooh, is it Bruce Timm or Bruce Wayne??" or "I bet this never shows up in the movie."

I agree. It's stupid. I mean, did she misunderstand what emancipation was, got confused and plastered yet another guy's name on her body like so much property?

Besides, if she actually killed Robin, there is no way in hell the Birds would accept her and help her emancipate herself.

The comments are fairly heartening on a lot of articles and videos about this teaser..for me. Fans are questioning why Harley is planting herself in the forefront of a series she shouldn't be in. People are asking why there are so many Harley movies planned. Others ask why she stole Misty's style and then ruined it. 

Happens to the best of us. But.. mostly to you apparently. 

This represents a turning of the tide - people starting to realise how shameless and irritating this all is. Before, if a solo movie was given to a female comic character and it tanked (usually due to lazy writing and crap dialogue - think Halle Berry's Catwoman) blame was given to the character themselves, saying people just don't want female heroes/villains.

Now the world seems to celebrate mediocrity - especially if they think the star's 'hot'. Yet they have poor opinions of Batman Forever... heathens. 

My point there was, it sucks because I want to support female led movies, particularly super heroes.. but I think I'll just hang out for Captain Marvel and Wonder Woman and leave this one. To those who would say give it a chance! Well, I did that with Suicide Squad and look how that turned out. 

DCEU has yet to prove itself with basic movies, let alone ensemble pieces. But it's fine, they'll just reboot the cinematic universe to try to save it and then make a new kind of mess. Tried and true!