DC Universe: Batman #89

Straight up, not a fan of the cover!

The concept is fine but the character design doesn't grab me. Penguin and Riddler look about right but Joker is like the skinny jeans version of himself.

Harley - ooh where to start? Right - face bandaid? Gross. Could be a racing stripe but you're either playing derby or you're not, and she's not so it's a plaster until further notice. Looks as if she's wearing a quarterback's armour with the flimsiest shirt underneath. Crazy skinny to the point where's it's distracting and you wonder why she had her arms surgically replaced with that of as young child's. Are these arms going to snap the moment she lifts that mallet? Her shorts look like a Warner Brother's cartoon ran headlong into her butt and saw stars so hard it left an imprint of their delusion - the only thing missing is the tweeting birds. How are her tatty thigh highs even staying up? The only part I really approve of is the sturdy boots. 

Then there is Catwoman - fine I guess, if you like vinyl chafing in your armpits. 

Anyway, comic opens with some hospital staff discussing how everyone's basically doomed because of dust and Joker toxins. I mean, this is a great point. Coincidence this issue came out when it did? Curious now if the vast majority of anti-maskers during COVID19 would wear a mask if they lived anywhere near the Joker or if they would continue their protest, albeit with big, new smiles?

The hospital chit chat gets cut short when Penguin gets unceremoniously dumped in their lap with a stab wound. Speaking of extreme Americano, Batman fights a dude in stars and stripes. It does not end well for stars and stripes man. 

I would like to point out that I haven't read the issues proceeding this so not 100% on what's going on, but I am going to question why if all of these people are in Gotham - why is it only raining in the cemetery? I would also question why the ER of Gotham's Mercy Hospital was so quiet and clean but eh. 

Right, so Harley is back in Gotham and is helping Selina take out a bunch of Joker... gas.. robot things?

I probably should read the preceding issues. Oh well. 

Harley's outfit now has the horrible trend of the pocket inners being visible and longer than the shorts themselves. I'm not sure what I hate more - this stupid trend or having to hate on it even though I support more functional pockets on women's clothing. 

Anyway they take out these goons easily and then Harley saves Catwoman from an arrow because.. this is a thing she can do now. Merlyn (?) and Cheshire show up. Not sure who Merlyn is, but it's a bit silly to have someone named that if they're relying on a bow and arrow instead of say, magic. It'd be like having Circe be a kickboxer instead of a crazy powerful sorceress. Plus... why is Cheshire so passive here? Why is the legendary assassin happy to sit back and back chat in full view of their targets?

Looks like her nose is broken but apart from that she seems fine and I doubt very much if a bit of readjusted cartilage is gonna stop her.

WELL I WAS WRONG. 

Turns out Harley and Selina had an epic battle with Cheshire and Merlyn OFF SCREEN and they won. Not only that, but they dragged their corpses back to the Riddler's hideout, which is where Batman is having discovered all the clues he needed.

Yep, the clown and the thief just defeated CHESHIRE. 

And the other guy I guess. But I mean... CHESHIRE?! 

The Cheshire that is not only as assassin but is crazy enough to poison steaks as well as her own nails in combat. The one that the services get briefed on. The one you don't see too often despite being in various groups and leagues because she's so hecking OP. 

From Wikipedia:

Cheshire is a skilled hand-to-hand combatant, and is one of the premiere martial artists and hand-to-hand combatants in the DC Universe. She is trained in several martial arts thought forever lost. In addition, Cheshire is also an expert triple-jointed acrobat, and uses this skill to move quickly and unexpectedly, and to also augment her fighting abilities. Of bigger concern are her artificial fingernails, which she dips in several varieties of poisons. She gives her weapons and other accessories a similar treatment. In Birds of Prey #63, Black Canary calls her "the second most deadly assassin in the world", only topped by Lady Shiva.

 

I mean... really? People were sooo angry when Harley outsmarted the Trinity of the DC Universe in Heroes in Crisis but at least that was kinda in character and she used her brains more than brawn, taking advantage of the heroes niceties. Here it's like... was Cheshire actually drugged and had broken all the bones in her body as well as suffering from the flu at the time this battle happened? Now this happens and it's off screen to boot and all the commenters don't seem to mind? 

...she says as a clown gymnast with a mallet takes down one of the best fighters in DC without any dramas...

The Short End of the Jester Shtick! 

So for the most part the art here is pretty good although there are several artists working on this title which can get a bit much. I enjoyed the bits where Riddler left enough clues for Batman - SPECIFICALLY Batman as no one else would have gotten them. 

I do not like the Cheshire fight "scene" as you may have guessed from above. As much as I love Harley - there's no way she should be beating Cheshire. Even a wounded one. 

This issue also gives us our first glimpse at Punchline, Joker's new hench wench and Harley rival. 

My husband walked past when I was reading this issue and said - and I quote - "UGH why do they have to make him look so sick and geriatric??"

A good question, my paramour. Joker is meant to be disturbing enough without looking like a plastic surgery zombie creep hanging around women three times younger than him. I mean, we read comics to ESCAPE real life!  

 Wotta Comedian!

Dr. Walter: I think it's mad, I really do... ...I think we should all be much more concerned than anyone seems to be.

Unnamed Dr: Come now, Dr. Walter. It's Gotham City. It's always a little mad here.

Penguin: And Batman just threw me out of his damn car.

Batman: I'm going to need another suit. 

Lucius: Another assassin, too, I'm guessing. 

Batman: Riddler... he's making gestures behind his back as he talks to this man... a sequence of numbers. 7-7-4-4-6-9. Hh. Sphinx on an alphanumeric keyboard. 

Lucius: You're kidding me. There has to be something in your cowl that did that for you.

Harley: Hey, Bats. Where should we stick the murder people?

Batman: In the corner with the others. 

Harley: Good call!

Bonus Panel!

Nice little Riddler throwback.