Dark Nights: Metal: The Resistance TPB 1

June 2018

The alternate, twisted versions of Batman—the Seven Dark Knights of the Dark Multiverse—are hunting the Justice League as the Leaguers attempt to locate artefacts that might protect Earth. One by one, Flash and Steel, Wonder Woman and Doctor Fate, Green Lantern and Mister Terrific, Aquaman and Deathstroke must face the Nightmare Batmen.

Elsewhere, Dick Grayson issues an S.O.S., summoning Robin, Batgirl, Harley Quinn, Killer Croc, Black Canary and Green Arrow to prevent the transformation and terra-forming of Gotham City into a twisted mosaic of monsters, magic and doom. When they are trapped in a Riddler-designed maze, all hope may be lost.

And where is Batman during all this? He’s trapped in his own private nightmare, reliving portions of his life while confronting Barbatos, the leader of the evil Batmen and the demon that has haunted his dreams...

Foreword, the trade tells you to read Dark Nights: Metal #1-2 first, but when have YOU ever followed rules?

So - what's happening here and is it worth all the hype?

Well, it's got a lot of artists so there's Harley parading around in a few different outfits (consistency, thy name is not Harley) some weird spiky fusion version of Batman and Joker, spiky zombie Robins, magic metal cards give to the usual Arkham assortment to create their own realms.. 

Yeah, it's not too different from the average DC event. 

Opening on Barbatos giving Riddler a card to create a doom maze and divvying out more cards to his cohorts Poison Ivy, Mr. Freeze, The Mad Hatter, Bane and... Firefly, maybe? Eh, I dunno. Probably. Anyway they all get cards to make their own realms to ensnare our intrepid heroes. I am personally a big fan of how the evil speech is still inspirational, and how everyone who gets one looks excited (well, Hatter and Freeze definitely, the rest are a bit unclear) about the possibilities, Poison Ivy is doing the teeth test to check hers is real but Bane's still like 'What is this card, puny demon? I do not play. Messing with ME is gambling, you got a problem!'

Damian - headstrong as always has gone on a gargoyle-back ride to Gotham which is... a little different.

You know, I don't really mind Damian. Not a fan of him when he's pushed into every narrative but I like that he's different to the other Robins even if he is a bit of a jerk. He reminds me of Huntress on a revenge trip - not afraid to do what's needed even if it ostracises them from the other good guys. Especially here, as much as he thinks he's better than everyone else and above all the petty emotions they feel, he still rushes into this weird ass place to save his Dad by himself.

Harley Quinn in DCeased - Issue 1

So this year's Marvel Zombies kicks off with... oh wait, this is DC. Hmm.
Well, I gotta say I approve of the name. Very good with branding. On point, even.
Still, can it live up to Marvel Zombies? Wait, it's not zombies but a plague? Oh, like Contagion! Yeah, that was an ace comic too.

Let's have a quick look at the synopsis...

“I looked, and there before me was a pale horse! It's rider was Death, and Hades was following close behind him.”-Revelation 6:8

A mysterious techno-virus has been released on Earth, infecting 600 million people and turning them instantly into violent, monstrous engines of destruction. The heroes of the DCU are caught completely unprepared for a pandemic of this magnitude and struggle to save their loved ones first…but what happens to the World’s Greatest Heroes if the world ends? New York Times best-selling writer Tom Taylor (INJUSTICE) returns with a terrifying new tale and is joined by artists Trevor Hairsine (LEGENDS OF THE DARK KNIGHT) and Stefano Gaudiano (The Walking Dead).

Wait... it's sort of plague zombies but technologically sparked then physically transmitted?

.................Is this like a smartphone STD public awareness campaign??
Greeeeaaaat, I'll just put it here besides the one for Herpes-Bathwater.







Opening up on the Justice League ganging up in the schoolyard to harass Darkseid. Scenes like this make me so thankful for Green Arrow.. like, he is such a welcome relief against the stark stone faces of the rest of the League. Ha! The Uncomfortable Interacting With Others and Emoting  League, more like. Wow, I could be a founding member!
Seriously though, it's why I was so disappointed with CW's Flash and Green Arrow. Maybe Flash was a bit more like his comic counterpart, but they were both going for the gritty Batman sort of serious hero, but the core part of their character is their cheerful, humorous and understanding, empathetic personality. I get they were trying to avoid going too camp, but when you have to introduce other characters as comic relief when you should be able to have your main character be that - it's not right. It's like how I feel, when Harley Quinn's first cinematic appearance is slugged with her trashy New52 persona instead of her actual personality.

Right, the other thing I wanted to talk about with these opening pages is the fact that every other Justice League comic seems to recycle the whole "OHMIGAWSH BATMAN IS KEEPING TABS ON US! SHOCK HORROR!" I'm not one to normalise this stalky behaviour but it's like.. did they never meet Batman before this? Like, he's openly told them before he has a contingency plan in case any of them go rogue... does this just constantly get retconned?

This is a core part of Batman's character and it's also very important to have someone on the team be prepared, because frankly no one else on the League is going to do it. Like, Flash and Superman and Wonder Woman would never think bad of their colleagues, but then again, how many times have the heroes been corrupted and used against the people they love or the people they've sworn to protect?
Who else is gonna stop a super powered time bomb? A paranoid loner smarty-pants Bat, that's who.

Harley Quinn: Premium Format Figure - Sideshow Collectibles

Sideshow Collectibles has been hard at work making some nice things that I can't afford right now, (and also spelling collectables in a way that offends both my British sensibilities and my spellchecker, but that's another matter entirely) so I thought I'd spend a little time talking about one of their new statues.

One thing I really appreciate with Sideshow is that they seem to understand the appeal of the classic Harley Quinn along with her various reiterations. They're also good at interpreting Classic Harley Quinn for people who want something 'new' without going as far as say, the Suicide Squad movie version of her outfit which is basically two-toned apples and oranges and a far cry from what she started out in.

That and their items are really high quality - hence the 'premium format figure' name being trademarked by Sideshow. They go above and beyond to make sure what they sell is great and packed with fun props/features and detailed bases. So, let's get into it.

Starting with the interchangeable faces - here we have two options. One has a skinny domino mask which showcases her eye make-up, which is sort of thickly winged out and has more traditional clown 'tears' make-up. Her eyes are ringed by light red colouring - which I think is meant to be a nod to her current style - one eye blue one eye pink/red - as opposed to the usual clown face paint.

This head has white greasepaint with a very very underhanded and pleasing blush effect. Her lips are a dark red with a bit of a black tinge - which combined with her displeased expression makes Harley look like a much more dramatic character. I like her loose pigtails - the colour is nice, I'd almost forgotten what she looked like without the dip dye! - and the highlights weaved through the natural looking strands looks realistic.

On the other hand - the other Harley head has a much wider domino mask - almost as wide as her cheerful yet vaguely garish grin. Her lipstick is just dark red, and looks a lot like Joker's smile, with the edges of her lips exaggerated and almost brought out into a Chelsea Smile. Her face has the same greasepaint and blush tones as the other head, but is encased in her classic jester hat. Her eyes have more of a smoky look to them - light greys gradually getting darker. Her eyeliner is still winged out and heavy towards the end. 

Countdown 51-40

Now that we've been going back into the Detective Comics showing Harley hanging out with Holly at the Amazon shelters, it's high time we went back and had a look at Countdown. Countdown was another multi-comic event spanning 52 weeks but good luck finding a good synopsis for that amongst the hits you'll get for the New 52 comics.

Back in the day, I pretty much just collected the issues that Harley Quinn appeared in, comprehensive storyline be damned! I ended up buying the trades though because I thought the story was pretty cool and there were some interesting things going on, and for once the holy DC Trinity wasn't hogging all the spotlight. Which is kind of the point of the 52 Countdown... but anyway.

May 2007 - April 2008
AKA Countdown to Final Crisis

Synopsis:

The Great Disaster has occurred, and all hell breaks loose as all the story lines in COUNTDOWN TO FINAL CRISIS come to a climax, threatening Darkseid and Jimmy Olsen and Mary Marvel and the future of their Earth!

So we'll dip our toes in, running through the series but mostly looking at Harley Quinn's involvement because... well, it's a Harley Quinn blog you nitwit. Get with the program. I'll do a couple of issues per post. 

This one opens with Darkseid discussing depressing world views with Desaad and playing chess with  himself, figures of DC characters and apparently no rules. Fun analogy or sneaky advertising for merchandise? You decide! 

The first chess piece he moves is Duela Dent - AKA The Joker's Daughter. Her story was a big part of what I found interesting about this series and another reason why I was so disappointed with what the actual New 52 chose to do with her character. 

Here she is, appearing in 'flames' and honing in on her target, a young celebrity. After jumping out the window amidst explosions she tells Tracey to call her manager in order to fund Duela with some nonsequential greens or else she might just drop Tracey as they parachute over the city. 

Duela is cool, collected and slightly sassy. Jason Todd/Red Hood shoots a hole in her parachute and she has no hesitations about dropping Tracey to lighten the load but at least she does it politely. 

Naturally Jason stops her and saves Tracey. They get into a discussion about who belongs where in the grand scheme of things and how cool foreshadowing is, then Duela name drops some people before running off. 

Meanwhile we pop into the hospital where a powerless Mary Batson nee Marvel is leaving. She finds out Billy Batson has paid her medical costs and left her a note saying not to find him, which I guess is like a health care one night stand, so she's a little cut. 

Heatwave is regretting not installing a peep hole in his door but lets Trickster in anyway. He suspects the pretzels are booby trapped so he destroys them but it was in fact the beer. So now there's no beer and no pretzels. Not a good start to a party. Plus Heatwave's pants are ruined!

Detective Comics #837 - Honour Among Thieves

Countdown tie-in
Dec 2007
Writer: Paul Dini
Pencils: Don Kramer
Inker: Wayne Faucher

Hot off the heels of Harley's previous release from Arkham incarceration is Detective Comics #837!

We open on the Riddler lamenting being a bit on the poor side since going legitimate but still loving the thrill of the investigation/lifestyle. The thing I like about Dini's writing is that - as well as being witty and entertaining - he genuinely seems to care for the characters he writes.

Riddler going legitimate could have been the corniest shit from the cob in anyone else's hands but here you are invested. You *want* him to do well as you see him struggling yet resisting the obvious pull back into the criminal lifestyle.

You can say the same for Harley. Dini is the best writer for her, apart from perhaps the Injustice guy. In this one book, she deals with going legitimate as well, finding her own way solo, running a team and taking down the bad guys.. and she does it with humour and without losing any of the charm that made us all Harley Quinn fans. Best of all, you get her accent without being drowned in a vat of marble mouthed exaggerations of English.

Bruce Wayne offers Riddler a gig which he readily accepts. It's to find a missing employee who seems to have absconded with a new drug that affects stamina and cellular regeneration. This gig leads him out of Gotham and into Metropolis and into the Athenian Women's Help shelter... from which he readily gets kicked out of courtesy of everyone's favourite reformed jester.

Told you. 

Yep, like the last Detective Comics issue I reviewed (here) it's another villain cross-over/team up, only this time they're both reformed.

Harley still has her trademark pigtails but has traded in her jumpsuit and prison trackies for an Amazonian stola/robe. She hasn't quite got a hang on the peaceful Amazon way though.

New 52: Death of the Family

Alright, fine, I'll read one tie in book in this lousy series! So here
you go.. for my torment and your pleasure - apparently - here is the two tie in books Suicide Squad wanted you to read as part of the Death of the Family Event.

Here we will sift through the wreckage that is Batman #13 and Batman #14.









Soo.... this one had me rolling my eyes already by page one. Yeah, I get that they're hyping up the Joker and having this major comic wide event but... damn.
Check the dramatics on this.

It's GOTHAM. It's always RAINING AND MISERABLE. Oh no, some force of nature backed the river up, better see it as a doomsday sign! Yikes. Then they're going on about a two headed lion. Gotta give Joker props for that, inseminating a lioness wrong and waiting months for the pay off. That's dedication.

We see Bullock and Gordon chatting about newspaper headlines and reading the bones but it's still not super clear if this is something someone's actually printed or what.

Next thing we know, this happens.

Just... straight up.. no chill, walking into a cop shop. So... basically we could have just had him walk in and take his own face back instead of Harley Quinn? Then why did you put us though those stupid Suicide Squad issues?! Gah!

Gotham City Sirens #7

Gotham City Sirens turn Holiday Story on us when we see Catwoman wailing on some jerks in Santa costumes. She laughs it off to the new Batman (Dick Grayson) but her bravado hides that little bit of fear we saw in the fight scene - she's still concerned about her heart.

Dick asks if the other sirens are staying out of trouble and Selena mentions that because the shelter was damaged recently, Ivy has gone to Central America and Harley is visiting family. Dick's pretty surprised as he can't picture her sitting around being jolly with family. What a weird thing to say, come to think of it. I mean, yeah, the new Hardly Quinn murder-go-round sex doll would be a weird, uncomfortable person to have around a Christmas tree, but sweet ol' pre-Flashpoint/New fifty-poo Harley Quinn?

Robin (Damian) busts in the room angry as hell, calls Selena a tramp, calls Dick a lazy douche and storms off, warning he;s going to take the Batmobile if Dick holds him up more than two minutes.
At least no one's surprised about THAT characterisation.

The other weird thing is when they do that obligatory holiday special thing where they cheers to friends who can't be there with them. 

So, Brucie is a given, but Alfred? Alfred just served you a drink two seconds ago, Dick! He's probably outside in the hall crying his butlery eyes out, man! Also not sure if that's meant to be Catwoman's semi-side kick Holly Robinson in the middle or if it's Jenna the Carpenter. Is the baby Catwoman's from that random side story she had once? Ivy looks pissed about being in the fire. That's fair enough. 

Moving over to Central America - Ivy is relaxed, footloose and fancy free in a jungle. Also clothes free, but that's fine because she can manipulate plant censors like a Disney Princess entrances small animals to do her bidding. 

She's wondering why they hell she doesn't just live here instead of the stagnant filth hole Gotham. 

It's a fair question.

Batman Ninja

Here's another version of Harley Quinn but set in feudal Japan as part of Batman: Ninja - an upcoming animated feature involving the Batman cast being transported to that era for some reason.
Actually, I keep reading that in the limited descriptions around but I'm not sure if the story is going to be ABOUT them all being sent to this Japan stage or if it's just an Elseworlds type story where Batman is established as a ninja already because that's who he is in this timeline.

Personally, I think it's going to be the latter and that would make for a much better story in my opinion but we'll see where they go with it.

There is super hype around a Harley Quinn/Catwoman fight but I can even look past the Catwoman obligatory ass shot because the fight looks amazing already!

They seem to have her doing her licky thing again though..

Between Maggot Robbie and New52 Harley Quinn, I feel like they're trying their best to be the whole VMA Miley Cyrus thing all over again. No one understood it then, no one likes it now.
STOP LICKING THINGS ALL THE TIME.

Gotham City Sirens #6

Jan 2010

When we last left off, original Joker sidekick Gaggy had been released from the big house (no pun intended) and was dead set on reliving the good old olden days.. you know what he means. The days with no Harley Quinn.

This cover... I like. Poison Ivy looks very powerful and the neon-ish petals are a nice touch.

Inside, Harley's getting dragged off to a nicer moider spot or maybe a retro death trap. Poison Ivy took a bubble thing (?!) to the face and now she can't adventure no mo'. Catwoman did not, I repeat, did NOT land on her feet when falling into the hyena enclosure, leaving thousands of fans and cat enthusiasts disappointed.

On the way to her certain doom, Harley catches Gaggy by surprise and he begins to villain monologue. It's nice to know that some things never change.










Selina and Ivy escape their own personal death traps only to fall victim to another one. They delay their painful deaths momentarily but end up calling for back up in the form of one Jenna Duffy the Carpenter and her Tools of Compounding Invoices.
That's pretty much how you know the Sirens were desperate. They may leave with their lives today, but my gosh they will pay through the nose now if they weren't already!

The thing I like about the Gaggy saga is how it quietly parallels Harley's story and gives a new insight to the Joker before she arrived.

Ame-Comi - Duela Dent #1-3

Loving this Duela Dent, her outfit and her text no matter how uninspiring the other issues are.
So that's something. Now finally, some backstory so we know why we should give a rats... unlike the Joker's Daughter of the New52.

Everything on this cover looks pretty awesome but again... what the hell is going on with Harley's hat? Does the artist know they're not actually like bunny ears or do they have some sort of power in this universe?

No one will explain anything!

Part I

So starting off with a description of her house - which reminds me of a Series of Unfortunate Events and her outfits, which make me think of Alice in Wonderland we have the tale of little Duela.
A precocious child on the edge of society, running free across the waste dumps...

Yes, she actually does that and barefoot to boot. Turns out the house is condemned, which is a twist I totally did not see coming. /Sarcasm. Wait, this is either a different day or she stopped in a room I did not see to put on stockings and maybe shoes? A wise move, considering there are like syringes and broken glass shards outside your front door.

As it happens, the home is heritage listed as a Gotham landmark and that's why it's still standing. Barely. But whatever, it's a cool home for a crook dad and his little scamp of a girl to hang out.

Ame-Comi Batgirl #1-3

Probably the first batch of comics based off statues of DC's women, followed closely by Bombshells and Gotham City Garage. When this first came out, I was so hyped about it because I love stories about women, anime, and Harley Quinn. What could go wrong?

Well, a lot of things. The story didn't exactly grab me, the art varied from issue to issue and for the most part, the characters never really seemed to mesh well together. Don't get me wrong, some did but it just read like someone had literally stuck all these characters together but didn't exactly figure out WHY they should be co-existing apart from NEW STATUES NEED TIE IN MERCHANDISE.

The other thing I need to mention is that pretty much the entire run was written by Jimmy Palmiotti and Justin Gray. Justin Gray has written a bunch of stuff for DC, mostly hand in hand with Palmiotti and Conner which brings me to the problem. I personally feel Palmiotti is a terrible writer.
His work is all the same, usually overstuffed with useless characters who are either bland or stereotypes of something and he's not funny.

Now, when I first read this series this name meant nothing to me but if you've read this blog at all you've probably read me cursing his name at least once for bringing such an obnoxious Hardly Quinn to life in her ridiculous solo. Of course, now I recognise the name it's easy to understand why I abandoned this series so early.

Mr Gray I have no opinion of apart from not minding the Catwoman Convergence and tossing aside the Power Girl/Harley Quinn nonsense. That and I honestly think he has sold his soul to Palmiotti because there is something else going on here. Maybe we should see if he's okay.

Harley Quinn 25th Anniversary Special

I figured I've worked up enough inner strength to actually put myself through this issue. I'm sure it's probably not all that bad, seeing as how the Conner/Palmiotti cliche machine hasn't written all of this book. It still means there's going to be a lot of people involved and each will likely have their own interpretation of what it is to be Harley Quinn and DC won't care about continuity because hey, they're DC. It's kind of what they do. Or don't do.

.....You know what I mean.


Anyway - in my opinion the second cover should have replaced the main cover - not just because it's the Dodson's and their beautiful classic Harley Quinn art but because it looks more like something she'd do. It ties into her circus theme and she's surrounded by toys of her criminal counterparts. The main cover is just some asshole ruining a cake and like a sad high school football player hanging onto their former glory... refuses to take off the sports gear.

Seriously though... that's a huge cake. And you're rendered it inedible by putting your various pasty body parts in it and letting your dog run around in it. Youuuu make me sick, Hardly Quinn.


Then we have this cover to make sure ALL variants of Harley have an equal chance to make money. Now this cover is fine, I guess, but at least the other two have the idea that there's some sort of celebration going on.

Here it's like she couldn't be more depressed while trying to be a bad ass. Yay, Harley's a sharp shooter instead of messing around with pop-guns! And for some reason has a cat head on a belt.. because she's... a Harley Quinn! Yeah!
Oh and they recycled that idiotic shirt from the movie. Ugh.

This page is like some rough draft of a Suicide Squad cover that Jim Lee already had available and he just said 'here ya go, I made this special for this comic.'

I have to assume this was followed up by a maniacal laugh and hand rubbing/beard stroking.

Batman Beyond: Comic Adaption

Let's face it - adaptions are hit and miss.

Things are cut out and missed in film adaptions because there just isn't enough time in the movie to include every awesome detail that the books had.

What about comic adaptions of already existing movies though?





In case you haven't watched Batman Beyond... go and watch Batman Beyond. And then come back.

Anyway, Batman Beyond is set in the 21st century Gotham City and features a new Batman - former bad boy turned hero Terry McGinnis who is reluctantly mentored by original Batman Bruce Wayne.
This says a lot about him because Batman Wayne has always been extremely strict with his Batgang and who can represent him and his symbol, even if he is too old to be the Batman himself anymore.
Terry  is enjoyable to watch and seems genuinely suited to the role of Batman. I am personally disappointed in the way he spells his last name, but I guess that's not exactly his fault.

What we're going to talk about today is the comic adaption of the straight to video movie based off Batman Beyond titled Return of the Joker.

Elseworlds: Batman - Thrillkiller

Published: 1998 

Writer: Howard Chaykin

Art: Don Brereton

Letters: Bill Oakley

Originally published as three single issues in the name of Thrillkiller '62, this collected volumes remains my favourite Elseworlds story and one of my better Batman related stories.

If the name didn't give it away, it's set in 1961 for the first part and then 1962. We're introduced to two vigilantes, Batgirl and Robin who seem to always show up wherever dirty cops make an appearance.

The art is pretty unique, dramatic and although it's more reminiscent of painted posters there's a definite feel of movement in it which is something that most modern artists fail to capture.

Batgirl has an exposed midriff but she's not oversexualised. Her physique and strength is the focus even though she's defined as so gorgeous she could give showgirls a run for their money.

This is something else most modern comic artists suck at portraying.

In case you're not familiar with it - the entire Elseworlds concept is to take existing characters and put them in different settings for a standalone story. For example, Gotham by Gaslight features a version of Batman that chases down Jack the Ripper.


So in this incarnation, Batgirl is the main hero with Robin as her sidekick. Her father is still the commissioner while Bruce Wayne - having lost all his families money in the depression has since found work in the GCPD.

Naturally, the world's greatest detective in bat ears is good at his job but never quite fits in with the others but gets along with and respects Jim.

Retro Review: Harley Quinn #12! Quintessence Pt 4

A Date Which Will Live In Infamy!

Nov 2001

Last issue, Harley had escaped the Bat-gang, Nixon was creating trouble, Batman shed his disguise and the Quinntets had captured Jack and Di Happi... while Chispazo has been taken to a secret room in Harley's hideout.

This issue literally opens with the Happi's perspective... tied together, upside down in an elevator shaft with Mr. Chitters - the vengeful monkey with the razor sharp cymbals for company.

Harley and the Quinntets have more important things to do than hang around and watch where the lift stops at. At least, they think they do, because Harley hasn't told them her exact plans for the evening yet.

Kenny is on Nixon's side.. his loyalty being extremely tested between blood and boss.

Nixon springs his coup just as Bo and Surley bust in - expecting only four or five henchmen buuuuuut.....

Nixon has been a busy little recruiter.. but luckily,  this slight distraction starts a massive free for all battle royale.

Retro Review: Harley Quinn #10! Quintessence Pt 2

Brilliant Mistake

Sept 2001

When we last left Harley Quinn, Killer Croc has just rendered her unconscious by using her as a bowling ball in her own bowling alley, no less!



Luckily, her subconscious (consisting of Angel Harleen Quinzel and Devil Joker) is here to help her snap out of it.

I love these two. Harley Quinn knows deep down that she should really listen to Harleen and that Joker is a bad influence, but the way these two characters interact with her show that she thinks Harleen is a buzzkill and even though she knows how bad Joker is, and they're all broken up.. he's still the tempting voice of fun to her, and is no way as abusive to her in real life.

That and she's pretty fast in reacting, thoroughly bewildering Croc before stabbing him with some pins and also some blows to his self esteem.

Three strikes, and Croc is out!



Pretty impressive, given that Croc often gives even Batman a headache. Harley has the element of unpredictability as well as the home turf advantage even though she's injured.