Harley Quinn and Batman #4

Part four of five opens with us seeing Shrubby curse Harley for wrecking up the club after he vouched for her. He also calls her a 'skirt.' Isn't that like, 20's Italian mafia speak coming out of the mouth of a 70's themed disco vegetable? Plus, she isn't even wearing a skirt which makes it a bit stupid to refer to a female as a certain part of clothing if she doesn't normally wear that style.

Anyway, Batman and Nightwing are waiting in Shrubby's apartment because of course they are and the whole thing sounds like a bad domestic violence screenplay

Batman: That's quite a shiner there, Dougie. Been in a fight?
Shrubby: I walked into a door.

While they're talking, Shrubby just straight up walks over to the window, opens it up and tumbles out. Does Nightwing make a habit of this happening? Of course, Batman's put a tracer on him and they're going to follow him straight to Harley Quinn.

Side note, Shrubby's feet just don't look big enough to support him standing let alone jumping out of a few storeys and running off. What is he, a six year old ballerina?

How much time has passed here? I assumed this was all occurring immediately after Harley flipped out for no real reason but in this time frame Batman and Nightwing have already heard the news about the fight and have in their own words - talked to literally everyone - and now Poison Ivy is apparently on a weird tutorial date with the Floronic Man.

Rebirth Harley Quinn: #32 Off the leash

Now here's a comic I haven't wanted to poke with a finglonger in a very very long time but seeing as how it's their last bow from mediocre comics (at least for now) I thought I'd see them out.
You know, mock them, hold the door for 'em, kick 'em on the way out?


Starting with the covers. Man, I get that they're hyping this whole world shaking death thing (did anyone NOT guess it was going to be Mason? Honestly curious about that.) but I literally cannot take Hardly seriously here.

For one thing, that hideous make-up running down her face and for wearing go go pants to a freakin' graveyard.












Shit, she even had a funeral corset in Suicide Squad New52 and spent half of Arkham City/Harley's Revenge with crying face mascara and she looked ten times more respectable than this! The other cover.... meh. It's drawn well (and therefore probably doesn't belong anywhere near this comic) but come on, how many memes of Harley Quinn have you seen like this? Nathan kinda looks like some rabid turd one of the hyenas shat out but it's one of his better looks.





Now this panel comes right after the Mayor literally tells them to off Hardly Quinn and Harley Sinn. He tells them to dump them somewhere, anywhere. Seriously. And one of the thugs actually goes along with the whole - "no, don't shoot my face because it'll upset my parents!" bit.

What - you think you're gonna get an open casket funeral instead of being dropped in a ditch somewhere? Idiot.
Firstly - that face ain't worth savin' sweetheart. Secondly - are they seriously dumb enough to shoot at Hardly's collar?



I was already rolling my eyes at the classic Bond villain 'leave the bad guy alone because they're totally going to die like, I'm 99% sure of it this time I think' routine, but this takes the cake.
Especially when everyone knows Hardly's not going to die. I mean come on, her neck isn't even damaged and they're like 'yeah, better not double check she's dead. I'm sure it's fine.'

Harley Quinn news - the turning tide, the animated spin off and more

Today I was reading some news and some Harley related things caught my eye, so here's my take on them. Please note some spelling corrections and punctuation have been added to original articles. 

When DC Comics Makes The Case Against Harley Quinn

Posted by Rich Johnston November 21, 2017

Harley Quinn is one of DC Comics’ most successful breakout characters in recent years. long before the Suicide Squad calm, she was the cosplayer's choice, with a variety of looks down the decades and a certain propensity to survive and prosper despite have no superpowers save for the ability to do whatever the hell she wanted and get away with it.

She currently appears in the twice-monthly Suicide Squad comic, the twice-monthly Harley Quinn comic and plenty of other spin-off one-shots, mini-series and specials. Oh and in this month’s Red Hood And The Outlaws #16.

In which she encounters the Amazonian warrior Artemis – who seems to have a different take than the DC orthodoxy, And one shared by a number of critics…

Artemis also calls Harley prattling and tiresome. 

With Sean Murphy‘s Batman: White Knight also distinguishing between the classic Harley that the book seems to favour and the more modern game-and-film influenced Harley Quinn that it dismisses as a separate character unworthy of Batman’s attention …is a tide turning against Harley Quinn from the creators at DC Comics? And with Jimmy Palmiotti and Amanda Conner leaving the book, will their replacements be such staunch defenders?

My thoughts on this is that I really hope so. I get that she sells, so naturally DC has her everywhere. There's probably some Harley Quinn in your own butt crack - that's how swamped we are with her. I don't really mind that she's everywhere but I hate the personality she has in the solo comic because she's very up herself. So when we get that, along with characters (talking about her Gang of Harleys or literally anyone in her solo series, Hack from Suicide Squad, anyone in the Suicide Squad movie, and even characters from Josie and Freakin' Pussycats) that are just there so they can gush over how *awesome* Harley is and how *unique* and how *hot* she is and so much *better* in her new self... is really, really, really getting old and annoying. 

Harley and Ivy meet Betty and Veronica #2

Here we are with issue two of Harley and Ivy meet Betty and Veronica. When we last left of, we had the implausible scenario where there was a costume scenario where literally no one looked like anyone but there was extreme drama about looking like someone else.

That said, cover one is actually quite beautiful while cover two is nothing to write home about.
I literally had a notebook at TAFE/college with that exact same spiral background.











So the issue literally opens with what could be the lamest fake-out in recent comic history.

The "bad guys" of the issue just happen to have two cardboard cut outs of Harley and Ivy in shocked poses, right down to Ivy's missing waist and Harley's untied shoe laces.

Untied shoe-laces? She is a *terrible* role model. That's effin' dangerous, that is!

Anyway the apparent villains are thugs that Harley and Ivy have crossed in some way - turning some guy into a peach head, some other guy has been ill affected by laughing gas, and some lamprey guy. I don't know if him being a lamprey has anything to do with Harley and Ivy or if he's just peeved about his poor money investment. All it tells me is that this comic couldn't afford Penguin.

But enough about these two bit villains no one cares about, let's get back to the costume drama.
Cripes, as if we need more costume drama with Harley Quinn but anyway.

If you can't have doubles Veronica, then perhaps you should have made a invitee register and made it very clear last issue.

Besides... and this is very important...
these two sets may as well be different characters because their costumes aren't *that* similar.







Hahahahahaha Can you imagine Veronica at a comic convention?

"Excuse me, you twenty thousand Harley and Deadpool cosplayers, we cannot have repeat characters or "old" versions. It is just too gauche."
Next minute - death by cosplayers. Geez, who even talks like Ronnie?

Suicide Squad New 52 #8

Nostalgia is awesome. If you asked me for ten cool things about the nineties, I could list my favourite artists, movies, video games, food franchises.... you name it. On the flip side, if you asked me for some dodgy nineties nostalgia something like this piece of... art... would be at the top of the list.

June 2012.

But it's not even from the nineties! I hear you cry. You're right, anonymous voice in my head. This is from 2012. This is not a good thing. That said.... at least four out of five characters are in proportion. What the absolute hell happened to Harley Quinn???

She's lost her eyeballs, gained some ginormous bazungas, changed the direction her hair colours go, her thigh is the same size going down to her knee and oh look. Eight issues in and there's already ANOTHER variation on her costume. Yikes.

Anyway... maybe the art is better on the inside.


Well, it is a bit but the logic is not so sound. Everything is blood stained red and that's pretty cool. Lime's death is relayed in a really awkward pose. Savant is also in an awkwarder pose than what we left him in. King Shark... likes showing off his gams in surprisingly clear sewage water.
Harley Quinn found the strength to roll over after being shot.

Wait, why was she shot? Oh yeah, she trapped Deadshot inside some random room in the Gotham City police station and put the skinned Joker face on him. Remember? There was a whole issue about storming the police station.

Soo.... why does the page say this was in Arkham Asylum?

I feel like ten seconds of fact checking would have solved this problem but no-one could be bothered. Won Fon Hey?

Retro Review: Harley Quinn #15 Metropolis Mailbag

Feb 2002

A really nice cover here - Harley just layin' around... picking um, a lot more than a a few flowers. Is she playing Love me Love me not or just spelling out her name? Let's hope Poison Ivy doesn't see her doing whatever this is or it may just be convenient that she's in a graveyard. 

I really like that Harley Quinn carries a hand bag around. It adds a fun level of realism to these larger than life comics. 

This issue opens with someone sending in their mail to Chance@Love - Holly Chance's romance advice column at the Daily Planet. This is a recurring subject in this issue, so watch out for our our guest star later on. Meanwhile, Harley Quinn herself is out robbing a garden supplies store and mocking it's employees. 

She's having a bit of fun doing this and doesn't want to leave until Poison Ivy formally advises her that their business there is concluded and Harley can drive. There is apparently nothing more that Harley Quinn loves more than racing around erratically in a drop top. Yep, even more than puddin'.


But there is something else missing from her life.. she says it's Thorn but she pretty much just symbolises a challenge. 

After a hard night's larceny, Ivy goes out for a sun-bake but warns Harley not to be late for her new job. It's fine though! Harley assures Ivy that she has a built in clock and for her, oversleeping is a physical impossibility!

So naturally she's several hours late for work - Harley truly is all of us. 

Yet Even More Ugly Harley Quinn Merchandise!

DID I HEAR MY NAME????

You know, this kind of post could go on forever the way DC is milkin' the ever lovin' fudge out of their main pillar. You know, the female one. No, the one that's not from Themyscira and is actually worth building a pillar around.

So yes, I have managed to find even more merchandise for Harley Quinn - merchandise that only the most dedicated fan could stomach, and even then not without wincing or cringing away from it.

Firstly - do you even look back fondly on Harley Quinn's original Suicide Squad outfit? Do you like horribly paired colours? Do you enjoy wearing socks and sandals together?

Then these Harley Quinn tights could be for you!

I don't even know what you would wear this with or if you could even really wear shoes with them on? Is that a white diamond on the blue calf or is it just a dodgy design job?

They retail for about as much as your average knee high tights (read: way too much) and don't actually resemble her costume that much.

How can one pair of tights cause so many questions?







Otherwise, here are some that are inspired by the grungy, infection riddled prison tatts from the movie. Let the world know you're obsessed, draw like a child and can't spell 'secret!'